Goals -> Systems -> Identities

Today at the gym I was reading a summary of the book, Atomic Habits. I had a mind blowing revelation (lol), an epiphany when the author, Clear, wrote about the difference between goals, systems, identity, etc. For years I have been on podcasts and in various interviews talking about the importance of setting goals and working to achieve them. Heck, I even shared the "Set Goals" as one of the top needs to move forward during a motivational speech I gave some years ago in Singapore!

The timing is perfect because I've been playing around with the term "consistency" in my head for the past few days, excited to share this in the next round of podcasts I will eventually participate in. Sure, setting goals and working to achieve them is important, but has goal setting really carried me forward over the past 18 years of my recovery?! No chance! It’s funny, because in a recent conversation I had with a colleague about recovery and life overall, I was sort of baffled when he asked me point blank, “so what is the new goal?” During my acute recovery, the answers would have rattled right off: “Go to Senior Prom, walk at high school graduation, get rid of the cane, be strong enough to get to college!” Now, however, it isn’t so simple to pick out specific goals.

Does it mean my recovery is slowing down?

Am I getting weaker?

No, of course not! It just means over years and years and years and years of working so hard to accomplish goals set for myself, that immediate endorphin hit and feeling of pride I used to feel has weakened. I’m still just as happy and proud as I was, limping around for the first time without a cane in little West Windsor, New Jersey as I am freely jaywalking (with my hand waving!!!) through the streets of Bangkok, but it’s a different vibe now. I am confident now. I shine with confidence. I expect everything to work well. It’s not the same feeling, and that’s okay.

Training both inside and outside the gym is what I do. It’s who I pride myself on being. It isn’t fair to say I am still recovering from my direct injury (18 years post, having lived independently in several different countries around the world), but the systems I have developed keep me in a state of perpetual progress. I am always improving. That’s who I am. Improving is my new identity.

Will I ever graduate from this second identity, who knows? Do I want to? I’m the most optimistic guy around, always smiling to strangers who have become friends on the street, beaming with pride because I feel like every day is the best day yet! I’m improving! What can be better than that?

The years of challenges stretching all the way back to my injury on March 3^rd, 2008, have taught me to develop the systems I need to always be getting stronger and better. Goals helped me at the beginning, for sure, they gave me the addicting endorphin spike feeling I needed, but simply working to accomplish goals won’t get you as far as unrelenting consistency. I’m improving every bit of every day thanks to the systems I have built in my head.

Maybe in some years down the road, sitting beachside on some random Thai island, with my wife, children, and dogs by my side, I can comfortably graduate into my next hopeful identity, winner. Until then, however, I’m improving, which can mean I am winning every day!